Successful Second Marriages Blog

We help remarried mid-life couples beat the 65% divorce rate, create beautiful marriages and live happily ever after together.

Romance Your Marriage By Expressing Happiness

Bring more happiness into your marriage today! Verbalizing your happiness out loud to each other is one of the most important keys to a fabulous and enduring marriage.

Couples who express their happiness with their relationship create even more feelings of connection and unity.

Some people have spent a lifetime expressing their dissatisfaction with life and find it awkward and almost difficult to speak words of happiness. Others rarely think about whether they are actually happy or not. (see Barry’s comments below)

Good News!

The good news is that happiness is a skill that can be learned. You can choose happiness as part of your life.

J’Anne says:

For the first 50 years of my life I wasn’t particularly happy. I wasn’t overly unhappy, I just hadn’t learned that happiness is a choice. I thought that happiness was external and came from situations, things or how people treated me. Once I learned that I was in charge of my own happiness and that I could create it within myself through my thoughts and attitudes, my life dramatically improved. Looking back over my life, I can see that ever since I learned that, I have been happy almost every day!

It is crucial to understand that no one can make you happy or sad.

It’s important to tell your spouse that you feel happy rather than that they make you happy. Thinking that you are responsible for another person’s happiness is stressful. It is impossible to make another person happy. You can do many things to bring happiness into their life but it is their choice to accept and recognize the happiness for themselves.

You are the creator of your own happiness within yourself. Happiness is a choice that you make regardless of your circumstances.

Barry says:

This is a tough one for me, I don’t usually notice if I’m happy. J’Anne is good at pointing out happy moments and she’s teaching me how to experience happiness.


Your Happiness is Your Gift!

One of the vital things that we have learned together is that your own personal happiness is your gift to your spouse and ultimately the world. Everyone around you benefits when you’re happy.

Remember the old saying – If momma’s  ain’t happy, no one’s gonna be happy?  We think it goes both ways cause if papa ain’t happy, no one is happy either.

It's time to upgrade from Happy Wife – Happy Life to Happy Spouse - Happy House. When both partners choose happiness life is sweeter.

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Side Benefits!

There is a curious and interesting side benefit to verbalizing your happiness. Whatever you say out loud, your own mind hears it too.

Your subconscious listens to every word that comes out of your mouth and then works to bring harmony between your words and your state of mind. The more you speak out loud your happiness, the happier you become!

Whatever You Look for, You Will Find

Start by recognizing all the things your partner does in your life that bring you happiness. If you spend a lot of time bemoaning all the things your mate does wrong, you will continue to get more of the same.

Look for all the good things your mate does and then comment on them daily.

If your partner knows how much you appreciate them and how much happiness they bring into your life, they will feel happy within themselves and more love for you.

The feeling of being in love is often a matter of how you feel about yourself because you are with your spouse.

Consider Telling Your Partner Something Like This

♥  My heart is happy that we’re married.

 You bring a lot of happiness into my life.

 I feel happy when we are just sitting here talking.

 I’m feeling so happy today.

 I am so happy to be your husband/wife.

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TIP: Ponder on the things that bring you happiness and tell your spouse one thing that makes you happy today.

If you need some help to start telling your sweetheart you love them, grab our free book below. It's 127 Reasons I Love You. You'll be sure to find many ways to express your love!

Let’s start the conversation in our private Facebook group about expressing happiness, we want to hear how it's going!

We’ve created a special closed Facebook group for you to have a safe and supportive place to share your ideas and concerns surrounding the unique issues specifically facing couples in the second half of their lives.

We believe that second (or third) marriages can be filled with love and happiness!

You can learn the skills and tools to make your marriage your forever marriage!

Here's a free ebook for you that we think you'll love.



127 Reasons I Love You

FREE digital book 



with love

Barry and J'Anne  
Transformational Marriage Mentors

J’Anne Monteleone is a certified Relationship Coach and Master Life Coach specializing in mentoring couples to enrich and strengthen their marriages. After spending over 30 years helping people design and build their dream homes, she’s now helping couples design and create their most important relationship: their marriage.
J'Anne along with her husband Barry Monteleone are certified marriage mentors and help couples transition through remarriage, empty nest and into a fulfilling and successful retirement lifestyle.
To see more information about Barry and J’Anne click here.